Stay Sane tips for the valentine season after your loss

TIPS FOR CELEBRATING THE VALENTINE SEASON WHEN YOU ARE HURTING EMOTIONALLY

This valentine season, millions of ‘love’ notes are being shared by people all over the world. There are ‘love’ decors everywhere and ‘love’ themes in the air. Some people install love rings on their cell phones; download free love songs and movies on their mp3 players. The whole world is going ‘love crazy’.

All these gadgets and events are ways in which people celebrate how they were captivated by the love of someone special. The ‘un-engaged’ on the other hand use the time to dream, imagine, and wish for a love of their life to show up somehow miraculously.

Grown-ups and younger folks play games and go to all length in a bid to ‘win someone’s heart’ for the first time or over again. We all crave for love; have the need to be appreciated, a need to be held in a place of unique ranking in someone’s heart. That is just the way we are designed.

However, you may be facing a challenging period in your life when all these romantic themes and decors seem to be a ‘distraction’ or something you would rather not think about.

It could be that your sweetheart of many years passed away and the wounds are still very fresh in your heart
It may be that you have had too many ‘crazy’ situations in the last few months. You could have lost something important such as a job. You may be feeling too overwhelmed to ‘think’ about romantic things now.


We recognize the challenges you may be going through during this period. We want to encourage you not to give up. Romantic themes can actually help heal your heart and ease the pain you are going through. Here are some tips and suggestions for spending your valentine season during this transition period of your life.

TIPS:


1. If you lost your romantic partner to death, try something different this valentine season.
Bring out the memories and do something creative with them. Replay the videos that captured your romantic moments. Take time to celebrate the past.


2. Find someone who can help you write a book in special honour of your partner. Write a special poem in their memory. Sing a song. Make a multimedia in their honour.

3. Find other creative ways of spending the Valentine season. Try not to be alone especially during the first Valentine’s Day after your loss.
Here are some suggestions:


a. If your children live nearby, invite them to spend Valentine’s Day with you

b. You may even try something bold. Invite other friends who have lost their partners to a valentine party.

c. Attend a valentine party in a community setting. Share your memories with others.

d. Invite a bunch of kids over and have a celebration with them

4. If you lost something important such as a job, try and use this period as a break. Allow yourself to be loved. Do not keep blaming yourself. This transition phase will not last forever.

5. This valentine season could actually become a season of healing for you. You need to play a part in this. You need to allow yourself to be loved again. Love is a reciprocal thing. To get love, give some away.